AMA
I watched a little bit of American Music Awards earlier. It was horrible at best, but it contained lots and lots of snark-fodder, so it was all good.Jessica Simpson spastically sang "With You." She sat on the steps leading down to the audience and breathed through the entire song and did the requisite hand motions, made famous by Mariah Carey and overused by Christina Aguilera. But the thing about her is her movements didn't match the rhythm of the song. It's like the song is going pam-pam-pam-pam, and her hands are going pampampampam. If you can understand that. Anyway, her hair was way to bleached and her extensions are so obvious. And when she's not pampampaming her hands, she's feeling herself up.
Anna Nicole Smith made an appearance. She was drunk and high and craaazzzy. And weird. And did I mention crazy? She crazily introduced Kanye West, or someone. And made crazy arm gestures and showed off her armpits and her boobs and made a pass at just about every guy in the place. I wouldn't be surprised to learn that in the process of lipoing her remaining fat that trimspa wasn't able to burn off, the surgeons also accidentally (or not) sucked off her brains. Something is definitely off with that woman. She's a fucking nutcase.
Kelly Ripa is ugly.
posted by Life @ 9:24 PM
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